Suffering

I have a hard time with this – reconciling suffering with an all-sovereign God who loves me. Questions toy with my mind and my heart.

Was this much suffering necessary? For this long? In this way?

It must have been, because otherwise God would never have allowed it.

Was it ordained? Is it purposeful?

Must be, because otherwise He would have kept it from me.

Was it grace? Was it mercy? Somehow a blessing?

Yes, because the God who bled and died for me would not allow me to suffer without good cause,

for any longer than needed,

or for any vindictive reason.

Still, I don’t enjoy this pain. Heaven seems far off; it doesn’t comfort me today. But Christ does. He sits with me in my grief and reminds me, “light dawns in the darkness for those who walk uprightly”. (Psalm 112:4a)

I’ll cling to Him while I walk forward, waiting for Him to make all things beautiful in His time. In the waiting, I hold onto the hope that He is making me into something beautiful.

No, I don’t love suffering. But neither does my Savior.

He doesn’t call it good, just worthwhile.

Every moment of pain – physical and otherwise – is only momentary. But what grows in this garden of life, through the weeding (pain), rain (grace), sun (blessings) and the waiting – it will last beyond today.

Because:

God’s grace runs deeper than my pain, and it will far outweigh my suffering.

Just as Christ’s glory outweighs His. We share in His suffering, so we also share in His glory. His Inheritance. His gifts.

Gifts that keep giving… beyond what these mortal eyes can see.

I’m praying for deliverance from at least some of these trials, because God bids us come to Him with what’s in our hearts. As I place those cares and tears into His hands, I’ll entrust my soul to my Faithful Creator, who promises to end all suffering someday.

Not just end it. Redeem it.

When it’s fully accomplished – that promise to make everything thing that’s wrong, right – I’m not sure we’ll even remember what we grieved. We’ll only know the joy of eternal glory.

Because suffering does. not. last. forever.

Just the reward of enduring does.

Keep your eyes fixed on Christ, and you’ll get glimpses of the good that’s coming for those who’ve placed their hope in Him.

“When the dear hour of the wedding feast shall come, all your toils will be as though they never happened. An hour with Jesus will make up for years of pain and toil.” – Charles Spurgeon

©️ Grace Baeten 2023